LIVID.

This is what I was earlier this morning. I had to write a few emails, so I'm better now. But, oh, man. LIVID.

Some of you may remember (but probably not) that a while ago I mentioned National Geographic's Genographic Project. I'm not linking to it because I hate them. Well, I hate someone, anyway. I'm not really sure who.

Here's what it is. National Geographic is sponsoring a scientific project to map human migration based on Y-chromosome DNA and mitochondrial DNA. Pretty sweet! A swab of your cheek cells will allow you to trace your ancestors back to the bowels of time. Kind of.

It still sounds awesome, and I would still recommend that you get involved with it.

Here's where the problems ensued. As most of you know, I don't have a credit card. Because damn The Man. The kit costs in excess of 100 dollars, and I purchased it online using a prepaid card.

A few weeks later I received an email stating that the "credit card number" I used could not be processed, and to call the customer service number. I did so immediately. What I learned is that, because the card is not associated with a billing address, their system can't process it. Super. Anyway. I told them that I would be sending in an alternate method of payment and not to cancel the order.

The very next day (June 15th) I mailed in a money order for the full amount. I don't have a checking account either. You know what? Stop judging me.

I heard nothing until two weeks later, when I received an email saying exactly the same thing the first email said. The credit card number cannot be processed, please call customer service for assistance. I call customer service again, and speak to two different people and tell the whole story. I tell them that I have already sent in a payment, and please don't cancel my order. Both (like the first one) assured me that they would make notes on the order and that it would not be canceled.

Last night, I received another email. It was sent at 8:45PM EDT. It said that the credit card number could not be processed and as they had contacted me several times about this issue I had to respond that day or else they would assume that I wanted my order canceled. I called them again. Spoke with a fourth person. Explained the whole thing from the beginning. Had this fourth person assure me that my order would not be canceled.

Also, on a whim, I sent a strongly worded reply to the email I received, saying how profoundly disappointed I was with the appallingly unprofessional manner in which this situation had been handled. Seriously, in that email? There were no less than three misspellings, so that when I called customer service, I checked with them to make sure it wasn't spam. In any event, it didn't bounce back, so someone received it. I'm sure it will accomplish nothing, though.

Today. I'm at work. I get an email. They canceled my fucking order. Because the credit card number could not be processed. Cue my head exploding.

I called again, immediately. Spent God knows how long on hold at various times. The problem as it stands now is, of course, they don't have the money order. Even though I sent it exactly as instructed by the very first person I spoke to one month ago. What I get from the chick I'm talking to is that they have not received the money order. They recently moved locations, and maybe it's lost in the shuffle somewhere. Basically, "Waffle, waffle, bullshit." And "she" says that they can only keep the order on hold for so long. "Who is 'she'?" I ask. The girl's supervisor. Can I speak with this supervisor? No, of course not, because the girl is not allowed to transfer calls to the supervisor. I can leave my number, though! Which I did, for the third time. Who wants to wager that I never get a fucking call?

So, as of now, I am out $100+ that these people have lost (I sent it over a month ago - what the fuck, please?), I have no order, and not one of these people knows what the fuck they are doing. At present, I don't know how I can complain more loudly or more vehemently than I have done, but I will find out how and I will do it. Because Jesus Fucking Christ.

On the other hand, I'm totally going into town to chat about Harry Potter later. And I'm getting another new tree for the front of my house, courtesy of the twip.