Goddamn it, Kirk.

I'm sorry. I totally forgot what other witty things might have made a good title for this entry.

Hi everybody! I was on vacation! To the Pacific time zone! The boy and I spent a bunch of time in the San Francisco Bay Area, hanging out with the Kirk and Mary-Jane. It was pretty good! You know, except for the part where the day after arriving I came down with a massive illness IN MY FACE. I don't know. I guess it was a cold. But there was all sorts of mucus and maybe fever, and at several points I wondered if I might die. So there was a bunch of days where I did nothing but stay in bed.

Luckily our hotel was really pretty and excessively girly and nice to be in. With a fireplace. And cable tv, so I got to see all the Pope Funeral that I could handle. And apparently, I can handle a lot. I just found it massively entertaining. If I'm ever religious, it's for all the ritual. All the chanting and the robes and the incense, man ... I don't know why anyone would want to be a religion other than Catholic. So cool.

There were also lots of cats. (And a doggy.) And important mailing of postcards. And I lost a bra and a pair of underwear. I'm not sure where or how.

I also lost my wallet in Sausalito, though I managed to locate it again. LUCKY.

I also lost my hat. Which is very upsetting. This is the one I blogged about, which most of my visited friends got to see (though I don't know if Kirk did). I was doing really well with keeping track of everything right up until the last minute and then everything fell apart. Maybe because I was so exhausted from the transportation and hauling and sickness. But, my hat is either stolen or in Boston right now. Tomorrow, Amtrak will tell me if I can get it back. I hope I can.

Before we headed back to the proper coast, we stopped for an interlude in Las Vegas. We stayed at Caesar's Palace! Naturally. That place was really nice. My bathroom had a bidet. I have never been so excited. Actually, everything was very nice and pretty, but also ... fake. Really fake. And there you go!

The important thing was that we got to hang out with the Spish! Bay-bee!! I've hugged Irina! She has the most entertaining baby face. Frankly, I don't think there's a more wholesome infant on the market today. Order yours now! I also watched some fish with Saren, who is my buddy, and Harper, who is my smaller buddy.

Also, the hotel was huge. No, HUGE. Freaking huge, people. It took us twenty minutes to get from our room to where we were to meet the Spish, then another half an hour or so to get confused and lost and find our way out onto the street and then more time to get back again. Planet Hollywood is no good, and Arnold Schwarzenegger has girly manhands.

On the flight back to Baltimore, we had this excessively strange stewardess (pardon - flight attendant) who called all the girls "Angel" and all the gents "Gorgeous."

Now I'm back in New Jersey, and I'm totally bored. But apparently, a whole hell of a lot happens in two weeks of internet time. I think I know too many people.